Is anything sacred anymore?!
In a sign of these strange times, the city Health Department has issued a stunningly blunt memo on how to stay clean while doing the dirty during the global coronavirus pandemic.
That’s right — the government wants in your bedroom.
First and foremost on its two-page list of tips: sex is safest with oneself.
“Masturbation will not spread COVID-19, especially if you wash your hands (and any sex toys) with soap and water for at least 20 seconds before and after,” the department wrote.
Good news, though, “COVID-19 has not yet been found in semen or vaginal fluid,” the notice says, adding that feces does carry the virus, and sex acts involving mouth-to-anal contact can spread coronavirus.
If you do have sex with another human, make sure it is “with people close to you,” like someone you live with.
If sex with strangers is your thing, the agency suggests “video dates, sexting or chat rooms may be options for you.”
Condoms and washing up are more important than ever, notes the memo, which was later taken down.
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