New day, new Kanye West buffoonery. No, it’s not a new Donald Trump ass kissing appearance, as it seems that Kanye’s favorite red MAGA cap has the weekend off to relax on the highest shelf in pride of place in his walk-in closet. Today Kanye’s blowing air kisses to deceased rapper XXXTentacion, defending the confessed domestic abuser through the age old technique of victim shaming in the name of selling a new single. Hope you have your preferred palette cleanser on the ready.
Fader tells us that there is a new posthumous album release by XXXTentacion called Skins, on which Kanye is the only artist (stupid enough to be) credited. On the track “One Minute”, alternately titled “How Long It Took Amber Rose To Get Me Off By Wiggling Her Pinky In My Butthole”, Kanye gives the rapper, who was shot and killed last June in Florida, a shout out before launching into how hard it is to be a famous rapper.
She wanna give you the cookie, you Famous Amos
She gave you the pussy but you ain’t pay for the anus
Now your name is tainted, by the claims they paintin’
The defendant is guilty, no one blames the plaintiff
Kanye should really go to lawyer college, as he really seems to have a knack for how the whole judicial system thing works. If he rally applied himself he could be the next Gloria Allred, but for the poor accused defendants! The only problem is, XXXTentacion AKA Young Dagger Dick (ouch, keep that thing away from me) already admitted before he died that he was a girlfriend abuser when he was secretly recorded saying:
“She fell through on every occasion until now. Until I started fucking her up bruh,” he says. “I started fucking her up because she made one mistake. And from there, the whole cycle went down. Now she’s scared. That girl is scared for her life.”
Before his murder, XXXTentacion was awaiting trial on charges of aggravated battery on a pregnant victim, false imprisonment and witness tampering. He had also been dropped from Spotify Playlists under their “hateful content” policy (along with that other stalwart of female rights, R. Kelly, it stands to be mentioned). Now is the time to pet that kitten, eat that Ding Dong, buy that stick-less pan on QVC or whatever it takes to bring back your heebie jeebies to homeostasis.
Soooooo, yeah. Kanye is still being Kanye and backing hateful men who turn that hate on women. But I think he should play on his strengths, because he really had something going there with rhyming “Famous Amos” with “anus“. He should make a spin off prostate appreciation record instead. He could gain a whole new audience and make the world a happier place, while at the same time being honest with himself about his enjoyment of the occasional “stinky pinky“. Amber Rose would be so proud.
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